Slovenia is My Home, Not America

Lena Zagar

At age seven a young Russian girl, adopted to Slovenia first stepped foot in America.  This child by the name of, Lena Zagar had no idea what her time here would bring her. The young blonde’s yearlong stay in St. Paul, Minnesota was just the beginning of her “Adventurous, fascinating, educational, entertaining and fun,” journey.

The Beginning of My Journey

When I first came to America I remember walking down the street by my house on Seventh Avenue to go to a coffee place.  Due to my lack of strength in the English language, I couldn’t read.  I could only see things and understand what was going on around me through my vision.  This is something I liked.

My original transition from Slovenia to America was simpler than most because my first time in America was short.  After, my yearlong stay in Minnesota I headed back to Slovenia where my family helped me adjust to being home again.  When I was in America I didn’t have much family, just my parents.  However, it is never easy to transition between cultures because the norms differ greatly within each country.  For example, throughout high school I was used to wearing high heels, we are a high heel country and everyone is very fashionable, and here everyone goes to class in sweatpants and sweatshirts.  I would like to wear heels, but I feel that if I wear them they will look at me differently and to me this is a bit of a transition.

I also remember thinking it was crazy people have to drive to get ice cream.  In Slovenia I could just walk or ride the transit. Not here, because it is such a big city there are so many buses and it isn’t the same.  When I was 7 and living in America I always had to ask my parents to pick me up from a friend’s house. I always asked them, “Can you take me here? Can take me there?” Being in America I felt very dependent on my parents, while in Slovenia I felt freer.

My Parents

I have a strong relationship with my parents.  Because my parents provided me with the freedom that I wished for.  For example when I would go out they would not be constantly calling me to see what I was up to or to know when I would get home.  They let me go out and enjoy my time out.  Instead of constantly telling me to do this or to do that.  They gave me my freedom, which in the end made the relationship between my parents and I really close.

My dad, who is an American from Oregon, hates America.  He is very anti everything, which in a way makes no sense since Slovenia is the same.  The politics in Slovenia are the same as in America, but they have different situations.  Yet, he likes it better in Slovenia because he feels free.

My mother is not an American, but unlike my dad she loves it here.  Just like how Americans say, “I’m going to Europe, oh my God I cannot wait,” Europeans are like America is the best country ever.  It was my mother who influenced me to come to school in America.  Just like how she got her PhD from Berkeley California, she wanted me to get an education.  Since she had once been a professor at the University of Minnesota, she told me about how good it was. Since I wanted to get a better education as well so I could improve my English I thought, “Let’s go, let’s do this.”

Dealing With a Barrier

There was only one problem, school is not my forte.  The biggest reason for this is because of the language barrier.  The language barrier really hinders me, because it takes me more time to understand and answer questions.  This barrier forces me to really think about what is being said, and what I want to say otherwise there is a chance that I will mess up with what I want to say.  For example on day in class a professor called on me and asked me, “What do you do with a coffee maker?” I answered, “You put it in the output,” when I meant to say outlet.  Then the guy behind me said, “She means the outlet,” and that is when the other students laughed.  It was so embarrassing, because I knew the right word, but since I was thinking in Slovene I could not translate it fast enough.  So I sat their embarrassed wondering, “What can I do?”

Speaking up in class is not the only problem that I have because of the language barrier.  The problem also lies with the homework that I have to do.  An assignment that was due for one of my classes recently took me five hours to finish.  The only problem was that this might have been one of the simplest assignments ever, but it still took me five hours.  Another example is any time I have to write a paper.  A lot of the papers I write I write it in Slovene first, then I translate it using Google translate.  I do this because it is way easier for me to write it out in Slovene and translate it than having to spend ten hours doing it.

Lena's home nation.  She is from the capital Libljana.

I am a Proud Slovenian

    

To me Slovenia is a great country, a wonderful country and a relaxing country.  It is the country I plan on living in throughout the rest of my life.  Slovenia is a free country, yes America is a free country, but to me Slovenia is more of a free country. In Slovenia I can walk anywhere I want and I’ve known the bus routes since I was very little. Also, when I’m in Slovenia I don’t have to worry about my parents always asking me where I am and when I’m coming home. I just tell them in the morning that I’m going out and that I will be back later.  Usually, I’m the first one to call and let them know what I’m doing. But when I’m here in America my parents are always nagging me and asking me where I am, when I will be home and if I did my chores yet. So I feel as though I have more freedom in Slovenia.

They only thing that I dislike about Slovenia is that I always have to look the best. When I’m in Slovenia and I don’t wear makeup one day, people always judge me and ask why I didn’t wear makeup that day. But here in America I don’t have to dress up everyday like I’m going out. I can wear what I want and choose when to wear makeup and not be judged. That’s one of the few things that I like about America, but other than that Slovenia is the place that I love and will always call home.

      

Being a dual citizen of Slovenia and America is something that I think I’m very fortunate to be. In order for me to travel back to Slovenia I just show them my passport and I’m off. I don’t need to fill out paperwork and get a visa to travel to other countries in Europe. However, it is very hard going from one culture to another and then back again. I have to get used to the norms of the country I’m in whether it is Slovenia or America. Even though it is difficult going from one country to another all the time I think that it has changed me as a person. I think that if I lived in Slovenia and never came to America I wouldn’t be the same person that I am now and vise versa. Going back has changed me for the better and has really opened my view of the world.

Image References:

1. Zagar, Lena. Self photograph, Circa 2012. Provided December 1, 2013

Story Facilitators:

Maggie Bures, Jack Holland, and Benson Crawford